Since I had my son four years ago, the number of days I spent climbing each year has plummeted, from more than 100 days to zero. Climbing has always been one of my favorite activities to do with my husband, but these days we have replaced play dates and picnics in the park with mountain adventures. Not a bad exchange, but still, I have missed climbing. Living in New York City and working a demanding job made me appreciate all the things it has to offer: the beauty, the companionship, the physical exertion, the mental challenge, even the fear. Raising my son, I looked forward to the time when I could introduce him to the cliffs, once he was old enough.
So the question became: “How old are you old enough to climb?” We have taken our son, Mason, to the indoor gym many times, but it wasn’t until we saw him clamoring to climb the “mountains” in the park near our home, the rocks in Central Park where visitors often picnic, that he felt he was ready.
So on a sunny day in early fall, we rented a car, pulled the gear out of the closet, packed the package, and after a short stop at Zabar’s to buy some supplies for lunch, we headed upstate to the mountains. Shawangunk, known as “the Gunks”. Our first pre-climb tour with our son was fun, but noticeably different from the pre-climb tours my husband and I had taken before. Instead of talking about routes to consider and plans to climb as much as possible, we sang and talked about the various trucks we passed by on the road.
Getting to New Paltz was exciting. A short stop at the climbing shop was like visiting an old friend. When we got to the trailhead it was early afternoon, a far cry from the alpine beginnings we pointed to in the past, although we rarely made it. My husband and I, back on our favorite cliff, now with our son, we were ready to embark on our adventure. We had thought a lot about how to give Mason a sense of ownership and accomplishment in our day and the first thing we did was get him to pack. We let him choose a few things he wanted to bring and included a piece of group gear so he could contribute.
Wow, he looked cute going down the trail with his little backpack!
We had a couple of routes on our list to check out, but it became clear pretty quickly that our first option wouldn’t work. A climb called Three Pines was as smooth as we remember, but the beginning had a sequence of stages that were too big for a little boy barely three feet tall. We decided to go down the cliff and soon dropped our packs at the base of a rarely climbed corner. The route was steep but full of perfect obstacles.
There is a moment at the beginning of any climb when the mood changes. The drive and hike can be casual and chatty, but then it’s time to get on the rock and the climb begins. We fixed the equipment and my husband, David, began to climb the cliff to establish the belay. After he reached the top and dropped anchor, I attached the rope to Mason’s harness, tied myself a few feet below him, and we headed up. With my husband’s safety carefully placed in view from the cliff and I a few feet below him, Mason set off. He hesitated, a little scared, and resisted. For a moment, I wondered if Mason, my shy and cautious little one, would have the courage to continue. But with some encouragement, she managed to overcome her fear and made her first move. Then another … and another, growing more confident as he learned to scan the rock and find the best hand and footholds. Before I knew it, we were halfway up the cliff and I was rushing to keep up. When he got to the crucial move (the most difficult move on the route), he had a smile on his face. We did the belaying with hugs and delight. Mason couldn’t have been happier. At the top of the cliff, we settled down to enjoy a picnic on top of the world. It was a brilliant moment and the proud ear-to-ear smile on my quiet boy’s face was unforgettable.
After our relaxed lunch, we had one last challenge. As climbers always remember, the climb is halfway there when you reach the top. After rechecking the anchor, I attached Mason and me to the rope and we rappelled down the cliff. The first step is the hardest as you trust your anchor and come off the edge of the cliff. Mason and I hold hands as we lean toward the rope. Once the rope had our weight, it was easy. We went down, taking our time to enjoy the feeling of total security on the vertical face of the mountain. At the bottom, we celebrated again, and then it was time to pack up the gear and head home.
Walking the mile or so trail back to the car is always a pleasant end to the day – passing other climbers and hikers, swapping short stories about the day’s climbs, and chatting with old friends. Our little one is shy. She has a hard time meeting strangers and is even reluctant to say “hello” to the guys who work in our building. But that day, perhaps buoyed by the confidence gained from climbing his first mountain or the feeling of kinship with his fellow climbers, or perhaps just the pride of wearing his cool backpack with a pair of carabiners dangling from the straps, he was there. with us, smiling and joking with the people we passed by. It was a great moment.
Since this first trip, we have climbed many times, both at the indoor gym near us and outdoors at Gunks, and Mason has eagerly embraced his new identity as a climber. When we’re in the park near our house, Mason brings his little rope and gear and strategically maps his route to the top of whatever “mountain” he’s climbing, no matter how big or small. And while that first trip started as a way to introduce our son to a sport we love, we’ve since seen the other benefits climbing has brought him. Climbing has given Mason a new sense of confidence, the confidence that comes from overcoming his fear, of the unknown, of failure, taking risks, and pushing himself to try something new and then achieve it. It has also given him greater resilience that has spread to other areas of his life: working on things that are difficult, overcoming small failures, and enjoying the challenge. For a shy boy like Mason, these benefits have been unexpectedly significant and rewarding. At school, his teachers have seen him come out of his shell and become a more social and vocal member of their class. Although this is due to more than just climbing, I can’t help but believe that the confidence he has gained through climbing has played a role. As I think of our next outdoor adventure, this time traveling to Colorado, one of our favorite places in the world, I think of my son’s proud smile, standing next to my husband, on top of the highest mountain in the world. world. that day.