Parents can be very concerned when they see their toddler throw a violent tantrum. Sometimes it’s really scary to see how upset a child can get when he wants what he wants. It is amazing how your toddler will not take the blows (i.e. will throw himself on the ground, kick, bite, scream, etc.) when frustrated. As a general rule, these outbursts are okay to ignore, as long as your child is not an area that could physically harm your child.
Unfortunately for parents, tantrums are unavoidable and young children at some point during the course of the day can experience this complete loss of control. Some may have more of these tantrums than others, but in general it is important for parents to know that this is the strategy most young children use to get their way. This happens because of your toddler’s limited vocabulary to use his words to express his wants, desires, and frustrations. During the first 2 years of a toddler’s life, all the toddler knows is how to cry.
If this strategy works for the young child, he or she will constantly use this form of communication. Young children will continue with this strategy because if parents give in or throw a tantrum, they will do the same the next time they say no. Once a toddler realizes that this is an effective way to change mom or dad’s response, their path as a parent will start to become extremely challenging.
What to do during the times when your toddler throws tantrums (and he or she is in a safe place) let them have it and don’t talk or get involved with your toddler. Do this until your child is completely calm and able to verbalize his needs instead of throwing a tantrum. The reason to wait is because when your toddler is in tantrum mode, he literally cannot hear or process what you are saying. You would be wasting your words to interact with your toddler right now. Just remember during the storm that it will pass very soon and do your best to ignore it.
Want to learn exactly how to eliminate your child’s challenging and out-of-control behavior without using punishments, timeouts, behavior plans, or rewards?