“We can still be friends?”
Sounds sweet, right? However, the truth of the matter is that you are about to be instructed by one of the oldest lines in breakup history. Your ex is effectively saying “I like you, but not enough to keep dating you.” At least not at this time.
When your ex offers to be friends with you, he’s dangling a carrot. If she’s the one who ended things, she knows you still love her. Instead of letting you go, she is cheating on you for her own selfish reasons. Being your friend is the perfect way to break up slowly, so she doesn’t have to feel any pain. Her ex can see you, talk to you, email and text you, maybe even hang out with you. She gets all the social and emotional benefits of having you around, but without any of the drawbacks associated with full commitment.
You, on the other hand, pretend that you are happy with such an arrangement. Right now you are afraid to tell her otherwise, for fear of losing her. So you sit back, “being there” for her, maybe even watching your ex start dating other guys. Every time you see her kiss a new boyfriend, your stomach turns… but there’s not much you can do. Because? Because you took a front row seat in the dreaded Friend Zone.
understand something If your ex offers you friendship after a breakup, it is You still haven’t gotten over your relationship.. You can use this knowledge to push her back quickly, before she leaves with someone else.
So how to get your ex girlfriend back? By No playing the nice little role of friendship she created for you. Instead, decline your ex-girlfriend’s offer of friendship when she gives it to you…or if you’ve already accepted it, you can throw it away from her right now. Say something like:
“Look, I can’t be friends with you. I love you so much. If you and I can’t date, we can’t be friends either. I’m sorry, but it has to be this way.”
Give him one last hug and then slowly walk away. Disappear for a while. Do not make any contact with your ex girlfriend, including phone calls, emails, or anything else. Don’t even update your Facebook page: you want to remain a complete and silent mystery to your ex…at least for a while. Make him have to face the breakup on his behalf, without you holding his hand.
This is where your ex needs to make a decision: either date you or lose you completely. You’ve let her know that you’re not going to settle for a half-hearted relationship, and she’ll really respect you for it. While she is debating whether or not she needs you in her life, she will also be worried about what you are doing. Are you with someone? Are you moving on without her? This kind of thinking will speed up her decision, which is why it’s so important not to know anything about where she is right now.
If your ex loves you, he will miss you quickly. Once you have that, getting your ex back becomes easy. There are ways to reestablish a connection with your girlfriend that will bring you back to romance. But never settle for friendship…not when you’re looking for something completely different.