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Dad’s Dozen protects children

Parents, take a moment to feel peaceful love for your children. Then check out these crucial tips to keep your child safer and protect your precious offspring from the danger that lies ahead.

1. NOW I KNOW MY ABC If your child is old enough to learn the ABCs, then teach him your phone number including the 1, area code, and number. Starting at age two, children need to know their first and last name, their first and last names, and their full address, including their city and state.

2. ROLE PLAY What if no one picks you up at school? What if someone knocks on the door with a package for you? What if mom falls and she can’t get up? What if someone told you that we are dead or sick and wanted you to go with them to the hospital? Do you tell someone on the phone that you are home alone? Teach your child how to make an emergency call by dialing “911” or “0” in an emergency. Law enforcement officials would rather send an officer off with a false alarm than have a child injured or kidnapped.

3. SECRET WORD AND PLACE Always decide on a designated meeting place in theme parks or shopping centers such as easily recognizable McDonalds restaurants. Many children, who are separated from their parents, do not consider themselves “lost” if they are still having fun. Be sure to clearly define “lost” as not with mom or dad. Come up with a secret family passphrase that no adult can guess, and make it a fun visual that your child will remember, like “Blue Hippo is Hungry.” Teach your child to ask permission from parents, teachers, or babysitters before going anywhere.

4. TINGLING TUMMY Children have no experience with evildoers, but they have survival instincts. They may not recognize a kidnapper or predator other than a funny feeling in their stomach that warns them of scary danger. Encourage this awareness by asking them in different situations: “Do you feel safe, do you feel good, can you feel danger?” when they are considering jumping from a high place, reaching out to pet a strange dog, or when they are around an overly friendly stranger or loud bully.

5. BEHAVE APPROPRIATELY We teach our children to quietly acquiesce to adults, but if a stranger takes them away, teach your child to throw a full-blown tantrum, yelling, “Kidnapper, help” while kicking and trying to get free. Once they are safe, they can turn to a store clerk, police officer or family for help if they get lost, frightened by an attempted kidnapping or predator. Tell your child not to walk away from you in a public place because someone might try to rob him.

6. SMILE The police need a full face photo taken within the last six months or, if your child is under two years old, four times a year. Prepare a kit for each child that is an emergency box. Put a current photo, a detailed description of your child, including height, weight, age, eye and hair color, birthmarks, broken bones, scars, moles, physical characteristics or medical needs inside the box. Include the names, addresses, and parents’ names of your child’s favorite friends, parks, and activities. Ask your dentist to prepare a complete dental chart for your child that is updated with each new tooth change. Ask your doctor for a copy of your child’s medical records, and remind him or her to make a note in his or her file that information should never be released without your written approval. Consider keeping an old toothbrush, baby teeth, a bloody Band-Aid, or a lock of hair in a sealed envelope as a DNA sample for the highest level of identification. Arrange with your local police department to have your child fingerprinted (the officers make it easy and fun) and they will give you the fingerprint card. Imagine if someone said that your child belongs to him, not you. The contents of the box will help prove that you are the father and help the police find the child if he is missing.

7. JUST FOR A SECOND A tired, burnt-out parent only needs to let their guard down for a second to allow a predator to act. He always accompanies his son to the bathroom, even if other adults are uncomfortable. To protect your child, never hesitate to take a child with you to the men’s or women’s restroom regardless of the child’s gender rather than sending them alone. A child is not safe playing unsupervised in their yard, walking alone, home alone or left in a vehicle, ever. Parents who have a toddler attached to them may seem tough, but imagine how you would feel if your sweet attention-deficit toddler or rebellious toddler walked away in the opposite direction. When you have two or more children, the difficulty of maintaining safety and order can grow exponentially.

8. YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHING Is someone drinking while looking at the kids and protesting that it’s just a few beers? Someone must be the designated caregiver and be sober, vigilant, capable, and kind. Note if your spouse or babysitter seems unaware or less sensitive to their duties. Depression, illness, alcohol and drug use in a caregiver can leave a child virtually unattended. Don’t let it continue. If a spouse wants to drink while on duty, he sells the car and hires a daycare to keep her children safe. Visit nannies and nurseries unexpectedly. Sit back and watch for a while. Listen to what your child says that happens there after you have left.

9. SEE YOURSELF Are you attracted to younger and younger people? Do your friends hiss like wolves at teenage girls? Are you looking at porn that uses young girls or teenage boys made to look older? Troubled fugitives usually succumb to posing for these pictures because they’re homeless or high on drugs. When you buy this type of pornography you are helping to exploit these children. “Developing and defending ‘model legislation’ regarding child pornography is crucial to a successful outcome in the fight against child pornography. Currently, only 5 of Interpol’s 186 member countries have strong child pornography legislation.” (http://www.icmec.org/missingkids). Were you sexually abused as a child? Sometimes if you were the victim, you become extremely attuned and more protective. Too often, though, the old fear kicks in and leaves him powerless to protect a child, even when the truth is right in front of his eyes. Talk to a therapist confidentially and regain your ability to protect your children and others from learning firsthand what he experienced.

10. YOU CAN TELL DAD A child will usually try to tell an adult about sexual abuse or incest once. If she doesn’t believe them or tells them they’re lying, they often won’t tell anyone else. Let a child know that you will listen, believe her, and stop anyone who tries to hurt her, even if the perpetrator is her best friend, grandparent, relative, or neighbor. Unfortunately, the child often knows the person who hurt him and that causes him great confusion and guilt. If a child is afraid or tries to avoid someone, you should pay attention, he is asking you for help. Some people use teasing and teasing to grab and touch a child and then tease them if they complain. Those adults are using your child and hiding behind humor. For the. When your son puts personal information on her clothes or on the Internet, it’s an open door for all the bastards in the world. Just say no to your child and explain why.

11. NEWBORN In the last twenty years, the highest number of child abductions has occurred in California, Texas and Florida. The profile of a typical kidnapper is that of an overweight woman who often plans the kidnapping in advance and takes advantage of the opportune moment to seize a baby. The woman often poses as a nurse or health worker and walks into a hospital room and brings the baby in for tests, etc. But a kidnapper could be anyone. “Although it is normal for new parents to be anxious, it is of utmost importance to deliberately monitor the newborn baby. Never leave your baby out of your direct line of sight, even when going to the bathroom or taking a nap. If you leave the room or plan to go to sleep, tell the nurses to take the baby back to the nursery or have a family member care for the baby… If you feel uncomfortable with someone asking to take your baby or you are unable to clarify what is being tested or why your baby is being taken out of your room, it is appropriate to go with your baby to observe the procedure… take at least one color photograph of your baby (full frontal view ) along with footprints and compile a full written description of your baby, including hair and eye color, length, weight, date of birth, and specific physical characteristics.” (www.missingkids.com)

12. CALL US

Professionals are ready to help you. “Since 1982, the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children has spearheaded the national effort to prevent child abductions and return missing and exploited children to their families. In partnership with the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP ), NCMEC continues to enhance and expand its ability to deliver critical intervention and prevention services to families and support federal, state and local law enforcement agencies.” (http://www.ncjrs.gov/pdffiles1/ojjdp/fs200128.pdf). The Kentucky Missing & Exploited Children’s Unit was organized in 1984 to create a centralized clearinghouse to help law enforcement agencies locate and return missing children to their homes. Many stores, like Walmart, have a Code Adam action plan: If a child is missing from the store, employees immediately mobilize to search for the missing child.

See http://www.missingkids.com, http://criminaljustice.state.ny.us/missing/i_safety/icac.htm, and http://www.take25.org for more information. The reality of today’s world requires parents to be super vigilant and take precautions and preventative measures to avoid kidnapping, exploitation, Internet crime, pornography, and violence. Parents, take the initiative to protect your children by being there, by being vigilant and by being trustworthy guardians.

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